A little thought about acting in spite of fear and a messy mind

A little thought about acting in spite of fear and a messy mind

 

The theory test is now the next step for getting the motorbike license. 
 
 
I’ve had so many opportunities for taking a ride when having met people around the place, but then everything has come down to me not having the papers. 
 
 
That reminds me of how much I have missed it, and cursed myself for not taking the license first. One learns a bit from impatience too, fortunately. 
 
 
It feels stupid and embarrassing to write, but then I think about the times I have encouraged someone to do something in spite of their excuses and fears, “It’s embarrassing”, “I can’t do that”, “It’s just stupid when I do it”, “It’s stupid”, “I could never do that”, and so on. 
 
 
Now I’m suddenly sitting here myself and can barely manage to write because “You idiot! Do you really think someone cares, do you really think somebody has use of this! It’s all stupid, why do you give this insight into yourself at all!” is thundering over my head. 
 
 
But then I remember what I have said to others, and what I wish they would just shut up and do since they won’t listen to me if I gently tell them that this is just excuses and fears talking: 
 
 

Just do it anyway. 

 

 
 
In most cases nowadays I don’t say anything, I just listen. 
 
 
I kind of just stopped encouraging people to act in spite of their fear a long time ago (sounds so dramatic). A person usually just gets mad if you push too hard and don’t leave them alone with everything that’s holding them back. 
 
 

Even what’s holding us back is familiar and dear to us, and we hardly let it go. 

 

 
 
That’s why it’s usually okay to just save this energy instead, because people, myself included of course, don’t do anything different until we are ready, or shocked enough, or tired enough, out of our regular daily life anyway. 
 
 
Enough.
 
 
 
 
So it was in fact I that met myself in the door, and I that just have to shut up and do it anyway instead. 
 
 
And what a relief that I did! It feels like a small victory.
 
 
 

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